I STILL WAKE UP ,

[rita4]

You know when you lost someone, it didn’t mean that death had to be involved, but you just lost someone, their friendship, their love, do you ever think of where it went? Those feelings, and that connection you used to once have, do you ever think you are going to get it back, maybe not with the same person as before, it could be someone new. But then, as you really think about it, each person is different. That is what gives you those feeling, love does not change but the simple context of it does, the big pictures of love is the same, you love someone and that is it, but falling in love with someone is different for everyone you meet, you may fall in love with their smile, or the simple way that they brush their hand through their hair, you could fall in love with the way they speak or just the way they make you feel. He wanted to have that feeling again, he fell in love with Bianca’s eyes when he first met her, he remember lying next to her the next morning and just wanting to lay there forever with her, she was so beautiful in her hungover states, and then there was Camryne, she was his first love, and she always would be, she was amazing in so many different ways, she was caring and kind, her smile just lit up the world.

Then there was Tabitha, I guess you could say that his wasn’t always truly love, it was mainly lust ot begin with, they had always been close but he was always with Bianca, he had dated the ex model for a long time and when they finally split, he went to Vegas to see Tabitha and they ended up sleeping together, finding that the spark that was between them was not just lust, there was something else, but then she found someone else, which didn’t help him as he was so caught up in her and couldn’t move on even though she was happily with someone else. But recently she had ended things with Hunter Vega and well he knew that she was in Chicago, they hadn’t really spoken still but he found out where she was staying and when he had a couple of days off, he made sure he had time to go and see her, he was technically going with Jolene right now, they had kind of made it official without actually saying it, but he wanted to see Tabitha, he wanted to make sure she was ok, it was just something he couldn’t walk away from right now. He really cared about Jolene and he was not going to hurt her by doing anything with Tabitha, but as I stated before, he just needed to see her.

So he caught a plane and made some arrangements and grinned as he entered where she was staying before knocking on the door and smiled while he waited, he held a bag in his hand as well as his rucksack on his back while he waited, when she opened the door, he gave his genuine cheeky smile before holding up the bag and passed it over to her ”There is ice cream, crap chick flick movies, and a bottle of vodka in there for you” he winked saying about the bottle of booze that was in there too before entering the place when he was allowed ”So how you doing?”

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TABITHA! | OUTFIT

[Deleted]

tabby tilted her head back and polished off her third glass of wine, her hand already reaching out for the bottle to refill it. as of late tabitha had been hitting the bottles pretty hard, convincing herself that she was drinking for thirst and no other underlining reasons. ever since she had gotten out of rehab, she had been able to control her drinking but after she had a run in with her brother about her relationship that she thought would last forever but that didn't quite work out like she had planned. everything went downhill when she had lied about dale coming over to visit, she didn't know that hunter had seen the male outside of her home. nothing happened that day, it was just the two of them hanging out and trying to get their friendship back. to hunter he said it was the simple fact that she had lied about it, granted, she shouldn't have lied but she did it for him. he always said that he felt uncomfortable about her relationship with dale, that she would one day come to her senses and run off to be with him. no matter how many times she told him that if she wanted to be with him, then she would've chose him.

ever since then things had been tense between the two of them and it was really becoming too much for her to deal with. she could only feel uncomfortable in her own home for so long before she packed up and came out to chicago to film, and when she realized that not even the distance between the two of them could fix it - she ended it. it was a common thing for her to do, when she couldn't deal with things, she closed herself off and pushed everyone away in hopes that things would get better on their own. the girl was fine with being single, she just didn't want to deal with the all the backlash, the talk about her being a slut and wanting to get back to her whore ways. being called a mini olivia, she wasn't really sure if that was suppose to make her feel like shit or if it was a compliment - tabby actually liked olivia, so she didn't really care. tabitha rarely cared about what people thought about her, the only people that she listened to were her brother and his family, mainly his son, rudy. if rudy wasn't happy with her then she felt as if her whole world was ending and she would never understand how someone else's son could make her want to do better.

her eyebrows furrowed as she heard a knock on the door, wondering who was coming by to see her. she finished off the last of the red wine quickly before she darted towards the door and opened it, surprised to see dale on the other side. speak of the devil. "hey there..this is a surprise.." she spoke, glancing down at the bag in his hand. tabby took the bag from him as she stepped aside to let him in, closing the door behind him. "ice cream and vodka yes, chick flicks..not in the mood." she said with honesty, letting out a small laugh as well. watching crappy chick flicks weren't ever really her thing, she couldn't get through that sappy, romantic shit to save her life without wanting to throw up. the girl placed the ice cream in the freezer as he asked how she was, she tilted her head to the side as she removed the bottle from the bag. "that depends, do you mean in general or how am i doing since my break up?" she asked with a smirk. that had to be the only reason why he even showed up and she had to admit she was flattered by the gesture. tabby grinned at him before eyeing the bottle of vodka, debating on whether or not she wanted to open it. "what's been going on with you, it's been forever and i was starting to think that you forgot about me." she stated, figuring it was better to wait on opening it.

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DALE | later | (:

[rita4]

Honestly, he didn’t really explain himself when he said he was heading to Chicago, his manager was going to be pissed at him for just going out of the blue, but then again, she should be used to it since he was doing it a lot these days. He was staying committed to the small film he was doing lately but when there was a couple of days that he could get off, he used them well, flying here and there and now seeing as he was technically with Jolene, he was making sure he was spending enough time with her, and even when they were apart, he made sure he called her or Skyped her. So he had told her that he was going somewhere, so she didn’t have to worry about him, also he was going to be back in a couple of days, he couldn’t be missed that much. He didn’t know why Hunter and Tabitha had split up, he wanted to find out for obvious reasons, they seemed really happy and when he went to see her last time, well he asked her if she was happy with him and she agreed, she was happy, she that was what he wanted for her, even though it meant that his heart suffered.

He needed to make sure she was ok, I mean he knew what she was like, hell she was very alike to him and the way he dealt with things, so that was why he needed to be there for her, even if he was just being a friend to her, I mean he needed to give Jolene a shot and he really cared about her, though he always knew that there was going to be a part of him that would always love Tabitha, even though people thought they would be the most dysfunctional couple in the world. Dale had been trying to keep himself busy, there had been a lot that had occurred in his life since Tabitha, too think it was such a long time ago that they were sitting in Vegas together, that day they just kind of hid themselves from the world and acted like the world was not waiting outside for them, to fuck them over like it always seemed to do. As he stood outside of the door he sighed and rubbed his hands together, composing himself a little more before he saw the door open and his hands returned to his sides, and clutched the bag he was holding.

He grinned as she opened the door before shrugging his shoulders as she said that it was a surprise ”I seem to make these surprises quite often” he was referring to Vegas of course. Then when she said about the vodka and ice cream but not being too keen on the chick flicks he just shrugged once more and then looked in her direction ”Most girls like the chick flicks, I went with what the lady in the store told me, then added the vodka because I know you” he smirked as he watched her place the ice cream away. She then asked about what type of ‘how she was doing?’ he just looked at her before sighing gently ”I just want to know how you are doing? Break up or whatever, I still care about you.” he had to admit that to her. He just needed to say it. Then she asked him how he had been doing, he shrugged, again. Before he looked around the place for a minute and then strolled around a little, just looking at stuff, thinking of the question ”I’m working on a movie, doing interviews and so forth, I could never forget you Tabitha. It was just hard to talk to you with Hunter who over reacted about everything” he shrugged as he looked in her direction.

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TABITHA! | OUTFIT

[Deleted]

tabby fiddled with the hem of her shirt as she leaned against the counter, her eyes tracing over at the male across from her. her feelings for dale were never going to change, she just couldn't see that happening in her life. she didn't care if people thought that their relationship would be dysfunctional - they weren't there in the room with them in vegas. tabitha could honestly say that what happened wasn't just sex, that it was something more but she couldn't bring herself to act on them. she figured that time had passed and he had decided to move on, besides she had just decided to take a break with hunter and she wasn't looking to jump into any new relationship. since the break up the only thing she seemed to do was party like there was no tomorrow, sleep around here and there but nothing out of the ordinary. well..ordinary for someone like tabby anyway. she quirked a brow at him as he made a referrence about the vegas trip. "not as often as i'd like.." she winked playfully. tabitha had always been the flirtacious type, half the time she didn't even realize that she was doing it. it was one of her many traits that sometimes got her into trouble with the female population.

"well then you should've known that i would've settled for just your company..or a twilight marathon." she grinned. "speaking of, just the other day i had a twilight marathon with jaiden and it was great. i wish you were here for that, i wore my team jacob shirt and everything for you." she added as she let her fingers drum across the counter top. "the vodka was a nice touch by the way, thanks again." her grin faded away slowly as he talked about how he wanted to know how she was since the break up. he had actually been the first person to ask how she was and not scold her about 'breaking' hunter's heart. another sweet gesture. she stared at him for a moment after he said that he still cared about her. well didn't that make her feel good on the inside. "i'm fine, uhh, filming has been keeping me busy..almost to the point where i want to quit this film." she laughed quietly. "but seeing as samson is the director..eh, i can't." samson was her father figure while her biological one cut her out of his life. she respected the man a lot and didn't want him to lose any respect for her.

tabby nodded her head at dale, letting him know that she was paying attention to what he was saying. seemed like everyone had been filming these days or were doing all the other promotional details. her eyes snapped down to the counter as he talked about hunter. oh yeah, there was that little situation. "yeah i know.." she mumbled queitly as she picked up the vodka bottle. tabs figured it wouldn't hurt for him to know how the break up even came about. "funny thing is, you're the reason why we're even at this point.." she laughed awkwardly, pointing the bottle at him. the whole thing was just so sad that all she could do was laugh about it to keep from flipping her shit. "he saw you that day you came to my house, he had to come home for something and he saw you outside.." she nodded with a small smile. "so he gets home and he asks me like, how my day was or whatever and i just lied and said i spent it by myself with the dogs, and before you ask me why i lied, i'll tell you.." if she could do it differently then she would've just told him the truth but she really thought she was doing him a favor. "you make him insecure and i figured i'd spare him the crazy ass thoughts by just not telling him that you showed up. so we argued about that and..i don't know. instead of arguing about things i just split, so that's why i'm here in chicago and single.."

______________________

DALE | later | (:

[rita4]

He watched her mess with her shirt, with a little side smirk lingering on his face, he liked being in her company, she always made him feel good about himself. He didn’t know if he was ever going to get over Tabitha Morning, he wanted to think that one day, just one day in the future he was going to wake up and not miss her anymore, not crave to touch her beautiful skin, the stroke her hair, to see her beautiful smile in the morning, for one time in Vegas he couldn’t believe how much she had taken over his life. When he had heard about the break up he was sitting on set and there was always a magazine or many that would be near him and he looked at the cover, and right there, in the corner was something about Tabitha, and he just didn’t turn away for once, he picked it up and read it, about the break up and how Hunter was feeling and blah blah blah, he didn’t read any of the shit that was written, he just knew they broke up. The first thing that came into his head was that he needed to find out how she was, so yes, he flew out to Chicago to see her. He knew that if Jolene found out about it and knew the history with him and Tabitha, well he couldn’t see that going down smoothly.

He remembered that time in Vegas, he remembered just looking at her in such a different way, he felt right being there with her. Every time he touched her, his body felt on fire, the way he kissed her had been more passionate than before, he felt every moment with her, was that the feeling of love? Because seeing as this male had an obscene reputation for just sleeping with women it was odd to have that feeling with Tabitha, definitely when they were both known for it, so yes, it kind of changed his mind about her, he just felt right, like all of the piece of his life had finally come together and made sense for once, he was able to be there with her, completely and she got every ounce of love that he was able to give. When she said that she didn’t see him as often as she liked and winked over at him he couldn’t help but smile, he loved the way she was flirty by nature, he didn’t think anything of it, I mean he liked the flirting, it made him feel closer to her, but if he was with her, the flirting would hardly bother him as long as she came home to him and didn’t do anything stupid, he was flirtatious, he knew what it was like to have someone be with you and always think you were trying to hook up with people just before you gave a cheeky smile or a playful wink.

When she said that she would have just settled for his company he shrugged and grinned before hearing Jaiden’s name, he missed that girl, they grew so close with work, she was such a nice person. ”Well I’m glad I have super hot fans like you” he winked softly before she said about the vodka, he shrugged in the kind of way that said ‘well you know me, and I know you, it was simple’. He asked about her, he wanted to know how she was, genuinely, not to find out if she was ready to bang him or anything, he just wanted to ensure that she was going to be ok after this, he didn’t know how attached she was to Hunter, he wasn’t around enough to find out, seeing as the other male didn’t exactly agree on their friendship. Filming had been keeping her busy? I guess that was a good think but when she mentioned Samson, he knew what she didn’t want to quit, they had hardly spoke about it but he knew that the male meant a lot to her so he would see why she wouldn’t want to bail on him. When she said that he was the reason that they were at this point, he cocked an eyebrow in confusion before watching her facial expression closely, he really wanted to know why he was involved in her breaking up with Hunter.

He listened as she told him what really happened before allowing a soft sigh to pass his lips slowly. He didn’t anything for a moment before scratching the back of his skull and looked her in the eye and moved a little closer ”I’m sorry Tabs, he just wasn’t good enough for you obviously” he smiled gently before stepping one more step closer, close enough to her at that he touch her before he slowly moved his arms and wrapped them around her and hugged her softly, he held her for a moment and buried his head into the crook of her neck before exhaling longingly.

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TABITHA! | OUTFIT

[Deleted]

tabby knew that he was dating a girl whose name she could never remember for the simple fact that she didn't care to know. she never thought that the relationship was that serious, actually she didn't really know if they were dating or just fucking around, hell she didn't even know what was going on with andrea and that girl was her roommate. for the past few months tabby had her head shoved up hunter's ass and she didn't care about what was going on in the outside world. tabs wasn't looking to jump into another relationship because she wasn't even sure if she was through with hunter. yes, she broke up with him and she was enjoying the single life but the universe had a off the wall way of bringing people back into your life and the last thing she needed was for hunter to weave his way back into her life when she was with someone else. tabby often found herself getting extremely jealous whenever dale mentioned that he was with the girl with the huge eyebrows or if he were sleeping with any other females.

only difference between her actions and dale were that she placed a smile on her face and acted as if nothing bothered her. she could tell when dale was upset over something she did, he made a point as to be a fucking asshole to her. "that you should be dale, okay, and you need to start appreciating us more. start giving us more shirtless pictures or..i don't know, just something." she beamed at him with giggle. tabby could never ditch samson, she may keep things from him but she would never ditch him when he put so much faith in her. when she was on set, she was as bright and bubbly as everyone knew tabitha to be but when she was here in her hotel room or in her trailer she was able to pour herself a drink or two and 'deal' with everything. "soon though, we'll be leaving chicago and start filming in la..so, i'll have other things to help me cope than just the drinking." she nodded. tabs didn't want to end up back in rehab or worse back in some creepy, old hospital for alcohol poisoning or some shit.

she leaned against the wall, her head propped up against it as well as she sighed softly. man, just talking about it drained her enough to the point where she wanted to pass out on the couch. she watched his reaction, not surprised that he didn't say much because really - what could he say? she scoffed at his words, not really sure if she agreed with what he had said. actually, she didn't believe him, tabby felt that she wasn't good enough for him. she was way to damaged for him, at least that's what she felt. she stood on her toes as she wrapped her arms around his neck to return the hug. "you're just saying that because you don't like him dale.." she smiled, even though he couldn't see it. "but really, i'm good - it's not the first time." she added as leaned back to look at him but she didn't step out of his hold. her eyes stared down at his lips for a moment before she walked back into the kitchen to get herself something to drink. "you want one?" she asked politely.

______________________

DALE | later | (:

[rita4]

So Dale had begun dating someone, I guess it got to a point in his life when he was a little sick of waiting for Tabitha to become single again, he just kind of gave up on the chance that he was going to have her one day, the relationship he was currently in was not serious, it was so out of the blue that they were still getting to know each other on a much deeper level than just fucking each other. He didn’t really want to talk about it with Tabitha, but if she was to ask about his girlfriend then he would tell her, he could never lie to her, it was too hard to see that look on her face when she actually trusted him, she was one of the only people that did. I mean he had been a complete and utterly asshole to her a lot of the time and she still took him back, and when she asked for the truth, she got it, even if he wasn’t too confident in telling her. It made him feel like he was back in Vegas, when he actually was honest with her for once and guess what; he still lost her to someone else, someone better than he was. It didn’t exactly do him that much, he realised that when he was honest about his feeling and what he wanted from someone, well it just got it thrown back in his face and he didn’t like that, so he decided to be a little harsher than normal with people, and now Jolene was the only one to get to know him again.

He didn’t keep track on who Tabitha was sleeping with, or seeing, or dating, he tried to act like she was never seeing anyone, that she was kind of innocent, just to put his mind at rest and to stop images seeking in there. Though some people liked to stuff it in his face when he was trying to forget whatever happened between them, some people like to torture him, linger in that moment when he was with Tabitha, having his hands on her skin, hearing the soft groans from the back of her throat, his fingertips digging into her flesh, even the thoughts right now turned him on. When he was annoyed he showed it, it really did show it, he turned into a complete jerk in front of people. Tabitha was a lot better with her emotions, she could come across like nothing bothered her, and it was hard to read her, she didn’t allow people the pleasure in doing so, so most of the time, he had to just guess that he was making the right choice and he wasn’t pissing her off. ”I can do shirtless, I’m normally shirtless” he winked over to her, he was definitely the kind of guy to turn up the heating in the middle of the winter so he could still wander around his apartment in sweat pants or basketball shorts. When she said about leaving Chicago and coming to LA ”It’ll definitely be easier to see you then”

He watched her as she leaned against the wall, to him it looked like she was just about ready to pass out and give up, he didn’t like that look. As he moved closer and hugged her, his hands fell softly on her hips as he held her close, liking the feeling of being close to her. Then she said that he was only admitting this because he didn’t like the guy, that was true and then when she said it was not her first time, it actually made his heart ache just a little bit, he didn’t like knowing that she had been hurt before, and he could be one of the reasons for it. She leaned back and didn’t move away straight away, it brought their faces too close, he looked down at her lips temptingly, finding his jaw clenched tight before he softly bit his bottom lip, finally tearing his gaze away from her prefect lips he watched her walk away as she asked if he wanted a drink, he brushed a hand through his hair and softly scratched the back of his neck before realising that she would want an answer to that question ”Urm, yeah sure, thanks” he smiled before leaning back on a counter that he was standing by before folding his arms across his chest and watched her ”So what is next for you? You going to focus on films and becoming even more awesome or you just going to chill out after this, have some Tabby Time?”

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TABITHA! | OUTFIT

[Deleted]

"that's right you do, i've known you for a while now, orchid heights..working out all the time." she smiled, remembering the good ol'days. it had just been so long that she'd seen him that she forgot about him and his shirtless ways. it was strange that a couple of months ago, they were extremely close, hanging out on a daily basis and then after vegas it all just came to a crashing hault. she took the blame for it all, she never say it out loud though, but she knew that she was the reason that he didn't want to talk to her for a period of time. "we have to get on another show or film together soon, i miss going on our morning runs and everything - we need to get it back." she smiled. "i just miss you." with that she just lifted her shoulders up and down lightly, the sincere smile still placed on her lips. dale was a great person whether he or anyone else stated otherwise, sure he had his moments he was only human, but when he was with her he was really affectionate and she loved that. behind closed doors tabby was an affectionate person herself, she didn't let just anyone see that side of her.

"i'm gonna remember you said that, i expect to see you when i get back." she quirked a brow at him, giving him a look that said she wanted to see him and he better hang out with her when she got there. the hug was something that she definitely needed and just the fact that she was getting it from him, the fact that he had flown out here to see her was one of the sweetest things in the world. she took a second or two to glance up at his eyes and realized that he was thinking the same exact thing, he wanted to kiss her just as bad as she wanted to kiss him. if he hadn't of been in a relationship with someone, she definitely would have taken the opportunity to kiss him. so she pulled away, letting one of her hands trail down his arm lightly as she walked away. she twisted the cap and thought about resisting the urge to take a swig off of it but her evil side won the challenge and she brought the bottle to her lips, tilting her head back to chug it. when the burn started to happen in the back of her throat, she set it down and shot her eyebrows up in a swift motion before she blew out some air on a huff.

she was way passed feeling ashamed or embarrassed by her alcohol intake, everyone who knew her knew that she could handle more than the normal person. they all didn't know the why because she never opened herself to anyone for them to know that she was the daughter of a raging alcoholic. alright, she wasn't going to think about this she needed to focus on getting the drinks together. tabby glanced over at him for a quick second as he spoke, taking her time to answer the question. she turned towards the fridge, bending slightly at the waist as she stared at the various juices that she had. not really sure on which liquid to choose, she grabbed the orange and cranberry juice, as well as a bottle of sprite - kicking the door closed with her foot. as she set them down on the counter, she grinned up at him before she nodded down at them, deciding to play bartender. "pick your poison." she told him. once he told her how he wanted it, she poured the vodka in her glass and left it at that, her hands grancefully placed the cap on it and set it inside the freezer to keep from warming up. "um, after this..i have a small part on a show called we were soldiers and that's all i'm inclined to say." she smiled.

"the filming is in la so..i'll be home for a while, which is great." she nodded. her smile was hid behind her glass as she looked over at him. "tabby time is all the time for me baby, i make the most of everything." she took a quick drink and leaned against counter top, her back arching on it's own accord as smirked up at him. "tell me about this girl, what's she like?" she asked curiously. it was probably the last thing he wanted to talk to her about but it was something that would keep her from trying to jump his bones.

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DALE | later | (:

[rita4]

He could still feel her skin under his fingertips, the way his hands brushed across the small of her back when he was trying to be all flirty with her on set, to the way they still touched her tenderly during their little Vega moment. He was convinced that he was still living in that moment sometimes, just remembering all the small thing he did in such a big act of emotion. When he was on the set with Tabitha and a bunch of other people when Orchid Heights was still being filmed, he used to be known as the guy that was always working out, to the point when he was filming two things at the same time and he’d have his personal trainer come down to the set to work with him, as between scenes was the only time he could get a work out in for the other film, it was a hard time for him but he was working hard and now he was having some time to himself, except for small filming for a pretty low key film, he was a free man and just enjoying being able to just relax. Then when she said about getting another film together he couldn’t help but smile and nod lightly in agreement. ”Even if we don’t, I will happily come and get you in the morning for a run, I like running with you, you bring the fun to it” he grinned, he was a big runner and Tabitha used to make it more of a pleasurable thing, than an actual work out.

She then admitted that she just missed Dale, he looked to the ground for a moment and then took his moment before looking back up and smiled gently, a caring and loving smile before looking her straight in the eye ”I missed you too Tabbykins” he smirked a little before finally tearing his eyes from her, finding it hard to concentrate when he was looking at her. He grinned when she said she wanted to see him when they both were back in Los Angeles, he was definitely going to keep her to that one too, it would be good to see her, he was a little sick of not being around in her life, she was a good friend before all of this shit happened and even though there was a lot left unsaid, he wanted to at least be able to have moment like this with her, just were they got to talk and be themselves, instead of what people saw in the magazines and tabloids. As the hug ended and he looked down at her lips he knew that they were both thinking the same thing and it kind of scared him, he didn’t want to hurt Jolene and he didn’t want to hurt Tabitha, it was just a complicated moment right there, and when she finally moved away from him, even the gentle stroke down his arm made his hairs stand on edge with passion and lust for her, he closed his eyes to keep himself calm before he opened them to see her swigging straight out of the vodka bottle.

He actually didn’t mind her doing that, if he had walked away he would have needed to do something like that too, they were kind of the same, he understood her even though she was not one of those kinds of people to talk about her feelings and so forth. He watched her grab the drinks before asking him what he wanted, he pointed out the orange, mixed with the sprite and then topped off with the vodka, that was a good enough drink for him. He grinned as she slid it over to him before he lifted the glass and took a long and large gulp of it, letting the alcohol sooth the dryness in his throat. ”I’m glad you’ll be in Los Angeles, my manager wants me to pick up some more work, so I’m looking more to staying at home and working from there, instead of moving around so much like before” as she leaned against the counter he watched her back arch before he bit his bottom and took another drink before setting it down on the counter and allowed her words to slip into his mind, his girl? Oh shit, yes, Jolene. He looked over to her before pouting his lips a little, trying to find out where to start before smiling ”Her name is Jolene, I worked with her on Abduction, she’s super sweet and we get on really well, it was kind of odd how we got together but I thought why not? She makes me happy” he admitted, seeing as he kind of needed to remind himself of that before he got himself into trouble looking at Tabitha.

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TABITHA! | OUTFIT